Tag Archives: courage

7 Ways We Give Away Our Power

Fit, Fabulous & 50+

7 Ways We Give Away Our Power!

 People Pleasing

Inauthenticity

Seeking Approval

Taking Offence

Feeling Superior

Betrayal

Dishonesty/Being Fake

Christmas is nearly here again! A joyous time of year! A time of connecting with friends and family, expressing love and feeling appreciation of all the good things in life!

It is also a time of extreme loneliness and isolation! Fear and anxiety can grip as we struggle financially, physically and emotionally!

This year I enter the holiday season with much sadness! I have lost friends this year! They will stay in my heart forever! Some friends have been taken from me and some have chosen to leave.  Loss is loss, however it comes! It pierces the heart!

This year I have become acutely aware that life is short and it has brought me to a decision.  I am finally coming out of the closet!! Yes, I am not going to pretend anymore!

Friends and family provide a deep and complex reflection of who we think we are! Sometimes they affirm and sometimes they injure; whether it is intentionally or not the pain is the same. It is fierce and it can cut deep!!

Now, being super evolved, aware and spiritual I realise that when I take offence that is my choice. In the past I have taken my offences and placed them on my mantelpiece next to disappointments and frustration. I keep them visible should I need at any time to justify my bad day, feeling down, feeling depressed or angry. Sometimes (more often than not) I get super superior and believe that the person causing the offence would not have behaved in such a manner if they were more conscious, more enlightened and more evolved (like me).

This well constructed philosophy falls down however, when I betray or offend myself. It is a tricky negotiation trying to maintain the moral high ground, against oneself. I believe arguments and grudges provide a convenient distraction from taking a good hard look at our own behaviours and impulses.  We like to blame others rather than own our behaviour!

I did promise to come out of the closet! – stay with me I have one toe out.

Right here goes. I like people and I like having friends, lots of them. I am pretty good at getting rapport and connecting with people, but at what cost? Sometimes, and only sometimes, I exchange my authenticity, with people pleasing, seeking approval and a need for validation for love and connection or my perception of love and connections.  This transaction or bartering renders me dishonest with myself and in my relationships. Out of fear of not being liked I have sometimes pretended to be happy, impressed or amused when the truth is I’m none of these things! I am very good at presenting a version of myself, that I think people will like. I have learned to be funny; agreeable, someone who acquiesces and nods, A LOT.

Thank you, for staying with me – I AM FINALLY OUT! And I mean out, OUT!

So I have made a decision to stop being fake! Strong words I know but such a relief to finally be honest, imperfect and real. I am going to own my power, and I am no longer willing to betray myself any more!   I am cleaning my mantelpiece (love house hold metaphors) and removing all the old excuses. And guess what? If I have betrayed myself with timidity and a need for approval then I have probably betrayed others with dishonesty and inauthenticity. I am probably sitting right now on somebody else’s mantelpiece!

Owning My Power!

I am not afraid to let go of the relationships that drain and deplete energy. I no longer feel the need to negotiate my sense of integrity in order to please another person. I believe that all the love and connection and self-worth I was seeking in others I already possess! Allow me to explain:

We possess the power to love ourself more and more everyday.

We possess the power to accept and love our imperfect self.

We possess the power to take responsibility for our own growth and development.

We possess the power to enjoy life’s journey and love every lesson along the way.

We have the power to let go of any offence and forgive our self for offending others.

We possess the power to feel deep connection with our self, our friends, our family and everyone and everything on this planet.

We have the power to come out of the closet and stay out!

We all have the power to live a free, authentic and courageous life!

If any of this resonates with you, or indeed,  if you disagree we would love to hear your comments. Join our community of Fit, Fabulous and 50+ by subscribing  to our newsletter. We talk about health, goal setting, aging, motivation, gender roles; going after your dreams and much, much more.

You may encounter many defeats, 
but you must not be defeated. 
In fact, it may be necessary to encounter the defeats, 
so you can know who you are, 
what you can rise from, 
how you can still come out of it. 

~ Maya Angelou ~

Our community celebrates women who have something to say and who own their power. We need more role models in this world. So please get involved and start by leaving a comment, about how you have taken back your power. Or indeed, you may never have lost it, which is equally enriching. The best conversations take place, in the comment box, which you can find at the top/bottom of this page.

If you have liked what you have read then please give us a shout out by sharing with friends, tweet about us or share on facebook.

As this Christmas season brings us into contact with family and friends let us be grateful for the friends that have touched our hearts and let go of the need to please and cajole. Let us all grow in courage as we speak our truth in love and let go of offences. Happy Christmas everybody, I hope it is a good one!

Dear Margaret Stubbs and Abraham Oswagwo I hope you are resting in peace, you will always hold a place in my heart and I thank you for it!

How important it is for us to recognize and celebrate 
our heroes and she-roes!

~ Maya Angelou ~

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Are you Sick and Tired of feeling ‘Sick and Tired?’

FIT, FABULOUS & 50+   NOVEMBER 2014
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Are you sick and tired of feeling sick and tired? Do you lack energy and feel sluggish? Are you tired and un-motivated to try new things or learn new skills? Fit, Fabulous & 50+ would like to hear from anyone who has ever felt this or may be presently struggling with these symptoms. We live in a stressful world and we will probably all struggle at some times or other to keep our spirit strong and remain buoyant when everything is pushing against us. Fit, Fabulous & 50+ aims to reach out and encourage with useful tips on how to reenergise after a period of malaise!

In order to achieve my goals I make my physiology my number one priority as it is a major contributor in creating an environment of optimism, clarity courage and hope. Health to me is not merely the absence of disease, something I am grateful for every day of my life, it is also about energy and vitality.

Rheumatoid-Arthritis – No thank you!

In 2005 I was diagnosed with Rheumatoid-Arthritis. I was offered a cocktail of drugs which I was told I would be on for the rest of my life. As a nutritionist I knew how food, allergies, intolerances and toxicity played a major role in our overall wellbeing. I took the medication and advice from my doctors but made a decision that I was going to clean up my act. That was when I started to make friends with my liver! Yes liver!! The hardest working organ in the body!

Liver Detoxification

I began the first of many liver and colon detoxifications and the results were staggering. Not only did my inflammation completely disappear but my skin started to glow, dark circles disappeared under the eyes, I had more health and vitality than I could ever remember. I was no longer tired, fatigued and within one year (it took many cleanses) I was completely medication free, discharged by my doctors and remain symptoms free. I am grateful to my doctors who helped me when I was unable to walk or stand up. I will share my experience in this blog because I believe our energy levels and health is related to how well we eliminate waste.

I regularly do a liver detox and I always feel fantastic afterwards. It is also the best antiaging cream I have ever used. I follow Dr Sandra Cabot’s Liver Cleansing Diet. She has delicious recipes which support the liver. I follow Patrick Holford’s recommendations and he has a book called ‘Say No To Arthritis’. I have learned about ‘fats that heal’ and take Udo Erasmus Oils which also lowers cholesterol while promoting healthy skin and lubrication for joints. Lastly but not least I drink lots of water. I consider everything I eat as to whether it is acid of alkaline for the body? By simply adding lemon juice to your water you are alkalising the body.

The Benefits

The positivity and strength I have gained from that experience in 2005 has filled me with gratitude every day and I have better health and vitality than I ever had in my 20s. I know that life is not easy and we all struggle at times but I would love to hear from anybody that feels they want to share some challenges that they have faced or are facing that has called on them to reach inside, meet themselves face to face, find their strength and conquer their fears. I hope this will encourage you and give you hope! Please leave a comment and help others at the same time. Thank you!

My six top tips to increase health and vitality.

• Make friends with your liver (contact me to find out more about liver and colon cleansing). (Eat, Pray, Love – Smile with your liver).

• Discover the beauty of ‘fats that heal’ – Udo Erasmus Oil

• Drink 2 litres of water a day

• Acid/Alkaline balance – use a squeeze of lemon to alkalise your water.

• Get a Nutri-Bullet (juicing)

• One Hour of Power (but this is another blog…)